David White, Executive Director of Big Brothers Big Sisters Australia, is concerned that not enough men volunteer in the community. He finds it frustrating that only 20 per cent of volunteer inquiries received by the national mentoring program are males, when 90 per cent of young people waiting to be matched to a mentor are boys.
White, who started the Big Brothers Big Sisters (BBBS) program in Melbourne in 1982, struggles to understand why male volunteers do not come forward.
‘I think they’re fearful of commitment, or perhaps they feel that they can’t contribute and don’t have much to offer’, he says. ‘They need to reassess that because they can and they do. They don’t have to be saints or be particularly insightful. They just have to be with the young person and be reliable and trustworthy.’
With the recent surge of interest in mentoring, White is hoping that men will finally meet the challenge. He welcomes increased media coverage spurred by the Labor Party’s national mentoring policy and the Coalition Government’s Mentor Marketplace program.
However, he quickly points out that growing attention to the idea of ‘fatherless boys’ or the lack of male role models should not be a judgment on single mothers.
He says, ‘the greatest mistake that most people make about mentoring, especially for boys, is that a sole parent family headed by the mother is inadequate for the well-balanced development of a young boy. That’s an absolute fallacy. There are many such families that are operating effectively.’
White explains that Big Brothers Big Sisters receives many referrals for boys because some mothers recognise that their sons are suffering in some way from lack of contact with males. He suggests that this does not mean families require a male figure, and in some cases it is better for parents to separate than for the family to continue in an unstable situation.
‘I probably get a skewed view of men, after more than 20 years of being involved in mentoring’, White admits. ‘I do feel that the male side of the species has let the family down on a regular basis. A lot of the women who come to us are sick of men—they have been used and abused too often.’
According to White, these mothers realise that, without having to seek a relationship with a man, they could provide their children with a supportive adult who would fill the need for connection. He